Yep, you read that right! This week’s funnies are entirely dedicated to alcohol and the holidays! What would we do without it? Some of us would strangle our own mothers, kill our co-workers at the office party, cold-cock the husband with a cast-iron skillet, or ram the neighbors’ giant lighted Santa up their asses because it feels like Clark Griswold’s family just moved in next door….without the aid of our long-time friend, alcohol.
Alcohol can’t solve our problems, but it sure can make parties more fun, relatives more tolerable, and well, you know! Alcohol can even make a headache go away…ahem. If you drink enough of it, that is! But be sure to stay home or have a designated driver! Please drink responsibly!
Ok, now on to this week’s funnies. Enjoy!
Think about poor Santa! How much alcohol do you think he needs to get through the holidays?!
Bottom’s up, my friends! Have a wonderful weekend and an even better Christmas! Don’t forget to spread that wonderful holiday cheer around! *Snort*
Here I sit at the computer, in the wee morning hours of Monday. I went to bed at 9:30pm Sunday night because I had 3 yummy Kahlua Mudslides and they really kicked my butt. (I should know better than to have more than one of any kind of alcoholic beverage!) After 3 hours of sleep, I was wide awake!
This is the time of the year when I get depressed. I just hate the holidays! I have never been a fanatic about the holidays but when my kids were growing up, I always tried to make it nice for them. It was fun making memories. I looked forward to having a house full of grandkids on the holidays to make even more special memories….but that’s where the depression comes in.
I don’t get to spend the holidays with any of the grandkids. It appears the newest grandbaby will be no exception. I’ve seen him 3 times since he was born, Sept. 1. I know they didn’t want to take him out until he was a bit bigger so I had no problem stopping by to see him. Chronic pain and mobility issues prevented me from stopping by more often. But now, my son and his wife are going here and there, spending time with her family…and here I sit waiting for them to come see me. They have gone out of town, and apparently, I won’t be seeing them on Thanksgiving either. So, it will be just Dad and I, once again.
That’s where the Kahlua Mudslide came in… I’m sick of feeling unnecessary, left out, and unwanted. I know alcohol doesn’t help but on the bright side, as I sit here my pain level is pretty low! Bazinga!
While most people were out celebrating at parties with friends and/or family, I was home with my Dad getting shit-faced drunk! Yep. You read that right.
We were in a bit of a predicament over the weekend. We were running very low on propane and that is our primary source of heat. The weather was bitingly cold and we were having to conserve as much propane as possible while waiting for the propane delivery guy. It’s the busy season and they are hauling ass trying to get to everyone — but as I write this, our propane has still not been delivered!
The temperature ranged from a high of 25 degrees down to a low of -10! I can’t recall ever having -10 degree temps in the 25 years I have lived here! It was a LONG weekend. We were bundled up, wearing the thickest, most winterized clothing we could find. We used the propane heat to warm up the house first thing in the mornings and then later in the evenings. In between, we used electric heaters which didn’t really cut the mustard. We were cold but we weren’t freezing.
Anyway, on a biting 9 degree New Year’s Eve, Dad and I decided to ring in the new year with a bottle of champagne and strawberry daiquiris! The alcohol lifted our spirits, warmed our innards, and made for some good story-telling and laughter!