Happy Friday! I hope this week has been good to you. Dad and I are on Day 96 of staying home. We only go out to hit the liquor store or pharmacy drive-thru windows. Today, we are making a run to the liquor store. How exciting. (Insert sarcasm.) We would be willing to go to the grocery store or Walmart, if only people were wearing masks and using social distancing BUT it seems (according to several local friends) people are doing no such thing. Oh, sure. There are a few but not enough for me to feel that Dad is safe. Even as the number of cases rise in various states, people don’t take this seriously. It hasn’t hit our rural communities; last I heard we’ve had only 3 positive cases. BUT it’s coming. I feel it. We stay home until I know it’s safe for Dad to be out without getting seriously ill with COVID-19.
Are you staying home? Are you wearing masks and using social distancing measures to protect yourself and others? Are you working from home? I bet you’re sick of it all, just as I am. A good laugh now and again helps. Here’s this week’s funnies to break up the monotony. Enjoy!
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What do you think? My favorite is “alcohol and horses” but the “guess what happened dog” is pretty dang close! I hope you got a few laughs, friends. Heaven knows we all need a good laugh these days.
I hope your weekend is good to you! Be safe, stay away from idiots, and look for humor in all places!
I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately…death and dying. It’s not a pleasant topic so I keep it to myself. I was thinking though, where would I like to go before I die? There are so many awesome places and sights to see on this great planet of ours. Of course, being disabled kind of puts a damper on those dreams of traveling. Add to that the problems with COVID-19 and well, I guess I’ll have to be content with seeing beautiful photos online, at least for foreseeable future.
I had a rough time with this list. There are so many beautiful destinations on Earth! When choosing a country, I then had to think about where would I go within that country? What would I like to see? Many were obvious but I had to really think hard on a few! Sooo many choices! This list is just a tip of the iceberg!
Where would you like to travel? If money were no object, and if you had no limitations, commitments or obligations, where would you go? Below are my Top 10 choices. I can dream, right?
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10.The Grand Canyon, Arizona – With the Colorado River flowing through this immense canyon of layered red rock, it must be a spectacular sight! The canyon is 277 miles long, 18 miles wide in some parts, with a depth of over a mile! People say photos and videos do not do this natural wonder justice! It must be witnessed in person!
Image by 272447 from PixabayImage by David Mark from PixabayImage by kahern from Pixabay
9. Antelope Canyon, Arizona – This gorgeous formation occurred from the erosion of red sandstone, due to flash flooding and winds. Several tourists have met their demise because flash flooding can occur even when it’s not raining. It’s especially dangerous during monsoon season. Light beams at certain times of the day create wonderful photo ops! I can only imagine!
Image by 272447 from Pixabay Image by PatternPictures from PixabayImage by hikersbay from Pixabay
8. Glacier National Park, Montana – This beautiful park of over one million acres, sits on the Canadian-US border. It consists of 2 mountain ranges, 200 lakes, 50 glaciers, thousands of species of plants and hundreds of species of animals. I would love to walk the trails that flow through the meadows and forests of this magnificent park!
Image by David Mark from PixabaySt. Mary Lake – Image: Public Domain by Ken ThomasTwo Medicine Lake – Image: Public Domain by National Park Service
7.Alaska – I was never particularly interested in Alaska until I learned of a train tour that takes you from Skagway through White Pass Summit, where you witness the glorious scenery of mountains, waterfalls, glaciers, and gorges. This historic railway was built in the 1890’s during the Klondike Gold Rush.
Image by Gill Keith from PixabayImage by lalycolon from PixabayImage by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay
6. Venice, Italy – Can you see yourself touring the city on a gondola and eating authentic Italian foods in quaint little cafes? I’d love to go sightseeing and witness for myself the incredible architecture, bridges, canals, churches, and museums. Of course, while in Italy, there are other cities worthy of visiting, too!
Image by David Mark from PixabayImage by Donna Opfer from PixabayImage by Serkan Turk from Pixabay
5. Sequoia National Park, California – Home of the Giant Sequoias! What a sight (and feeling) it must be to stand next to a 200 foot tall tree! Imagine the trunk of that tree having a 40 foot circumference! Some of these sequoias have a life span of over 3000 years! Can you even imagine that? I’d like to hike the trails in this park and view the waterfalls, caves, cliffs, and canyons for myself.
Image by Klaus Stebani from PixabayImage by nmnm from PixabayImage by Roselie from Pixabay
4.Finland, Norway& Sweden – Well, these 3 gorgeous countries are tied for 4th place on my list. Why? I couldn’t decide which would be the better option to view The Northern Lights! Aurora Borealis can be seen in such glory in the Lapland/Arctic of these countries. I’d love the chance to camp outdoors in various spots for some fantastic photos! I would also have to visit some of Finland’s beautiful castles, such as 15th century Olavinlinna, which was constructed on a rock in the middle of a lake, the 13th century medieval fortress Turku Castle with 2 dungeons, and I can’t forget the Snow Castle! They rebuild it every year because it melts in the Spring! It has snow beds, thrones, sculptures, towers, and even a drawbridge – all made with compacted snow! Norway and Sweden also have a few medieval castles I’d love to see.
The Northern Lights – Aurora Borealis – Image by Sturrax from PixabayTurku Castle – Image by a_alanko from PixabayLumiLinna Snow Castle – https://www.facebook.com/LumiLinnaSnowCastle/
3. England – My #1 destination in England would have to be Stonehenge! There’s debate over the age of this monolithic monument, but it’s speculated that it was constructed around 3000 to 2000 BC. After Stonehenge, I’d have to roam the country-side looking for castles! The 12th century Windsor Castle, 11th century Tower of London, and Warwick Castle (also 11th century) come to mind. I can’t forget other sites such as the Wax Museum, National History Museum, and William Shakespeare’s home. Jurassic Coast World Heritage Site is something I know very little about, except that it has rock formations which span 3 of Earth’s time zones – Triassic, Jurassic, and Cretaceous – 185 million years in all! It would be a breath-taking sight!
Stonehenge – Image by Zdeněk Tobiáš from PixabayTower of London – Image by Pierre Blaché from PixabayJurassic Coast – Image by Dimitris Vetsikas from Pixabay
2. Ireland – Of course, I’d be remiss if I didn’t visit some of Ireland’s castles! Kilkenny and Carrickfergus Castles (both built in the 12th century) are definitely on my list. The famous Blarney Castle (15th century) would be my first stop, I think. Why wouldn’t you want to kiss the Blarney Stone? Legend has it that if you kiss the stone you will receive the “gift of gab” (great skill of flattery). To kiss the stone one must ascend to the castle’s highest peak and lean over backwards from the parapet walk. Not sure if I could do that even if I were physically able, but I’d like the chance to try! I’d also hit a few of the local pubs, because why not? When in Ireland, do what the Irish do, yes? Ireland is home to many a lovely landscape; waterfalls, cliffs, caves, and sandy beaches. Also on my itinerary is The Giant’s Causeway, a rock formation nearly 60 million years old! Legend has it that it was created by giant Finn McCool.
Blarney Castle – Image by Per Waernborg from PixabayIrish Pub – Image by Rudy and Peter Skitterians from PixabayGiant’s Causeway – Image by Ben Kerckx from Pixabay
1.Scotland – Scotland will always be my #1 because of the beautiful landscapes and of course, the castles! My first stop is the 13th century Eilean Donan Castle. She is my all-time favorite castle, but others I’d like to see are the 12th century Stirling Castle and the Wallace Monument, Edinburgh Castle (also 12th century), and the 13th century Urquhart Castle. Urquhart sits beside Loch Ness, home of The Loch Ness Monster, aka Nessie. While in the Highlands, I’d most definitely put on my hiking boots and find some photo-worthy sights – I’m sure there will be plenty of those! Caves, waterfalls, sandy beaches, and other castle ruins. I’m sure I’ll be busy…and exhausted!
Eilean Donan Castle – Image by Bernd Hildebrandt from PixabayStirling Castle – Image by abaltatzis from Pixabay
William Wallace Monument – Image by Sophia Hilmar from Pixabay
Urquhart Castle overlooking Loch Ness – Image by Josef Pichler from Pixabay
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Whew! There’s my list of places I’d like to see before I die. You may have noticed that most of my destinations include some hiking, which is something I always enjoyed. If only I had the money to do these things back in my backpacking days! You may have also noticed that I have a passion for castles! I love Medieval History and castles! My ‘handle’ for most online activities is “Castlefreak.” I used to have a Facebook page about castles, but I just didn’t have time for it. I’m thinking of reviving it!
I do hope you enjoyed my list! I enjoyed making it! I’m sure I’ll think of places that I forgot, but I’ll just make another list later – because, why not?
Some of my best memories are of my kids as they were growing up, their friends, and my nieces and nephews. I really miss those days. I was younger, not disabled, and they were the best years of my life.
I’ve found myself being reminded of several events this past few days. I’ll see something on tv, read something, or see a photo that reminds me of something from the past. Sometimes it makes me laugh, and sometimes brings a tear to my eye. I’m sharing a few of those memories with you today.
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My son’s first day of Kindergarten didn’t go as planned. He wanted to wear his new Batman flip-flops to school and I didn’t see a problem since the weather was still very hot. The flip-flops looked something like these pictured. Within 2 hours of being in school, one of the flip-flops broke. He was devastated. When I went to pick him up that day, his teacher told me that it ruined his entire day.
via Amazon.com
That very same teacher, when my son was an adult and out of school, saw my son and I in the Walmart parking lot. She yelled, “Chuck, is that you?” My son yelled, “No!” I must have laughed for 30 minutes!
I recall one April Fool’s Day, my son and his then-girlfriend decided to play a prank, and it was a good one. I had no clue what they had done until mid-morning when I went to get a fork for my pancakes. I was completely shocked as the drawer was completely void of knives and forks! “What the hell happened to all the silverware?” I yelled. I walked into the living room and there they sat with smirks on their faces holding back the laughter the best they could. Suddenly, something caught my attention from above and I looked up. Lo and behold, every knife and fork we owned was taped to the ceiling!
Another April Fool’s Day, my son thought it would be pretty funny to hide the car. (He was old enough to know how to drive.) He moved the car behind the shed, out of sight. It was after lunch before I looked out the window and noticed the car was gone. I thought someone had stolen it!
I was 35 for 5 years before my kids did the math. Yesterday, my daughter pm’d me and asked what I would like for my birthday this year. I replied, “Oh fuck. Do I have to have another? I’m too fucking old already,” to which she replied, “What? You’re only 35!” Of course, I laughed my ass off just being reminded of those years when I got away with being 35 years old!!
From the ages of 6 to about 12, my daughter would wake up in the middle of the night, and sit with us in the living room. She always had this glossy-eyed, out-of-sorts look on her face, which told me she was sleep-walking AND that she actually got up to go pee. We would sit and carry on complete conversations with her, until I told her she should go to the bathroom. She would get up and go, and then head right back to bed. The next day, she wouldn’t remember a thing!
One time, my son and I were going to Walmart and it started to rain – POUR down rain – just as we got there. We decided to make a run for it. He was only about 4, so I was holding his hand. I hit a giant puddle of water and landed face-down, taking my son down with me. We got up, soaking wet, and my poor little boy looked up at me and asked, “Why’d you do that for, mommy?”
A friend of my son’s came over one day after school. I think they were in high school at the time. I don’t recall what we had that evening but the friend stayed for dinner. Afterward, he told me that he’d rather I take his plate to the sink, because he didn’t want to break our good China! It was very thoughtful of him but I assured him, they were Dollar Tree plates and definitely NOT good China…although they were probably made in China! We all laughed. It was pretty funny at the time!
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Well, there’s a few random memories that are now documented in type, so I won’t ever forget…unless my blog gets deleted. Ugh. I’ll bet you have some pretty funny (and fond) memories, too.
For some reason, Nirvana’s performance of The Meat Puppet’s song, Plateau, has been stuck in my head all weekend. I don’t know why. I haven’t heard it in ages. It always makes me laugh to hear, “Nothin’ at the top but a bucket and mop and an illustrated book about birds.” Of course, from what I understand Kurt Cobain purposely chose songs that were a bit out of his vocal range on purpose for this Unplugged performance, so that’s part of why it sounds so silly and makes me laugh! Anyway, I’m sharing it now so you’ll have it stuck in your brain and…I won’t. Hopefully. Snort.
Happy Friday, Folks! So, what’s going on in your neck of the woods? I hope this week has been good to you. Have you taken the time to laugh? I think it’s helpful to unwind with some humor so, without further ado, let’s unwind with Friday’s Funnies!
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I’d have to say #4!
No, 2020 would have to be worse than the prep!
I wish they’d come for me!
Something my son would have done if given the opportunity!
It’s just a flesh wound!
I know people who would do this if they could!
Yeah, whipping cream sounds much better than horse manure!
Who the hell wants to grow up?
Wow. I wonder wtf happened in 1620?
I hate this word, but knowing what it meant in 1544 makes me feel better about using it.
Who knew?
Did you know?!
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I’m having a hard time deciding which one is my fave! There are 4 that had me rolling… The “WTF Tombstone,” “Growing Up,” “Cunt,” and “Hamburger” were pretty dang funny to me. What do you think? Which ones made you laugh the most? Let me know and if you run across any funny memes you’d like to share be sure and send them my way!
Have a super weekend, everyone! Don’t forget to live a little and laugh a lot!