I don’t know if I’ve ever mentioned this in my blog, but I cannot stand to look at Steven Tyler. In case you don’t know who he is, he is the lead singer of the rock band Aerosmith. My eyes have had an aversion to his face since I was very young.

When I was a teenager, I used to go to the music store and rifle through the records to see if there was anything I wanted to spend my babysitting money on. I think that’s when I first saw Steven Tyler’s face. To this day, I have never owned an Aerosmith recording.

If he comes on tv for some reason, or if there’s a post about the band on Facebook, or various other sources, I avert my eyes. I just can’t do it. You probably think that’s silly. It’s awful but the man gives me the creeps. He looks like his face has been melted and then molded back imperfectly.

My Dad used to ask me, “What about so and so? Don’t you think he’s ugly?” I told him, “I can handle ugly. Ugly doesn’t bother me.” I mean, people can’t help the way they look, right? Steven Tyler can’t help the way he looks either and I know how shallow I sound, but I can’t help it!

My ex told me once that if he shaved his mustache he would look like Steven Tyler. I told him if he ever shaved his mustache off he could find the damn door.

My brain protects me from Steven Tyler. Years ago, I had a dream with Steven Tyler in it. I don’t know why. It just happened. In my dream, I couldn’t look at him either. I woke up relieved. My brain protected me.

I can’t listen to Aerosmith’s music even though I like some of their songs. I always picture him singing and it creeps me out. The soundtrack of the movie Armageddon features several Aerosmith songs, including the song “I Don’t Want To Miss A Thing.” I love the song but it’s really hard for me to listen to it. Not only is it rather sad but I can see his face singing it. I try to envision someone else singing it but it doesn’t always work.

Oh, and there was a video back in the day when MTV played music videos. The song was “Pink,” I think. It really gave me the heebie-jeebies. I know you’re laughing at me. I can’t help it. Look up the video and watch it. *Shivers*

Last week, I had a dream that Steven Tyler moved into the house next door. (There isn’t a house next door because I live out in the boonies.) I think I had the dream because Dad and I watched Armageddon on Friday night. Anyway, Steven Tyler kept coming to my door and knocking but I knew who it was and would not open the door. My brain protected me, yet again.

I don’t know the psychology behind this so if someone has any clue, let me know. I just know that I will continue to avert my eyes until I am dead…and hopefully in the afterlife as well.

You can stop laughing now.