I’ve been trying to get back into the swing of writing in my blog more often, as you’ve probably noticed from this week’s posts. I’m trying to come up with new ideas for writing and I think I have a few for next week, so be fair warned! I’m still having a hard time with this new editor. I can’t seem to figure out how to resize the photos while stacked, only if they are individually placed. You might know what I mean if you’re using the new editor yourself. (I always wonder why things have to be changed when they worked perfectly fine before. You know the old saying; Don’t fix it if it ain’t broke!)
Last week’s funnies didn’t seem to go over that well, so I’ll stick to what we like best: funny memes, cartoons, and photos. Enjoy! As always, please let me know what you think!
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Eww…
Looks like a great shoe to shove up someone’s….
I need this sign!
Understatement of the decade!
Oh, the nerve of that cat!
I’m about sick of the rain!
Right, ladies? The struggle is real.
My tongue would thoroughly enjoy this!
This one’s for you. Veronica. 😉
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So, there ya have it, folks! I think my favorite tonight is the sign with the bite taken out of it! I hope a few (or more) made you laugh. I try, but what’s funny to me may not be so funny to you!
I hope this week has been kind to you. Short as it was (with the holiday) it seemed to go by so freakin’ slow! Here’s to a great weekend, folks!
And I shall leave you with this cute little fella! Let’s celebrate with him!
My name is Honey. Mom calls me Honey Bear, but most of the time she calls me Fatty. Fatty McCatty. I’m a whopping 22 lbs. of CAT. Not fur, like most people think. I’m heavy, and fur doesn’t weigh that much!
It’s been raining an awful lot and I’m not happy about that. Neither is the rest of the gang. Jack and Alice go out on the catio and get wet. Then they come back in bitching. Mom says, “Haven’t you learned anything, you big dummies?” I laugh because I’d rather be fat than dumb! Kitty doesn’t go out on the catio much. I do, but sometimes Jack is mean to me. I don’t know why. I like everybody.
*Coffee pots that make 5 oz. cups. The box says, “Makes 12 cups!” I call bull squirt! I know their cups are based on restaurant cups but when we buy a coffee maker for home, most of us are using 8 – 12 oz. mugs or maybe even bigger. A cup is 8 oz., not 5!
*Children are our future. They are precious cargo. Most (normal) people would agree. Children are required to wear seat belts while in a moving vehicle. Unless it’s a school bus. What? Why the heck are kids not required to wear a seat belt while on a school bus? The driver of the school bus is required to wear a seat belt! I can understand that it would be quicker to evacuate a school bus if no one is wearing a seat belt. I can understand that no one would be trapped in their seat if they aren’t wearing a seat belt. But don’t those things hold true for any vehicle? What about an unfortunate accident that flips that bus over and over again? Are those kids going to survive or walk away with no injuries if not wearing a seat belt? This has bothered since my kids had to ride the bus to school.
*Does it make a lot of sense to say, “It was in the last place I looked,” or “It’s always in the last place you look,” when obviously it was literally in the last place you looked? I mean, where the hell else would it be? Why would you keep looking after you found the item you were looking for?
*Reality shows don’t make sense to me. I have my own reality. You have your own reality. Why watch someone else’s reality…especially when it’s scripted and not reality at all?! Reality shows are hogwash. Those people (in many cases) are being paid to behave badly. We need to stop making stupid people famous. That just doesn’t make sense to me.
*The other day, I was trying to get into an online account that I hadn’t used in a while. I tried logging in but I was told I had entered the wrong email or password. So I tried another of my commonly used passwords…and another…and another. Still denied access. So I tried my other email address and those same passwords. Still no access. So I decided to use their “Reset Password” option. I was asked to choose a new password. When I entered one I was told, “You cannot use your old password.” I wanted to throw the computer out of the damn window!
*I can understand having 3 different sized cups for drinks if you are ordering from drive-thru window or placing a to-go order inside a fast food restaurant. But why offer different sizes for people (other than for small children) dining in? If the restaurant is offering free refills, doesn’t it make better sense to just have one size cup, perhaps medium? Why should a person have to choose the size cup when they can get as many refills as they want before they leave?
*Automatic hand soap dispensers in public restrooms make sense. But at home? Why does it have to be hands-free? You’re not going to touch the dispenser after you wash and dry your hands, are you?
*Why do they package light bulbs in flimsy cardboard packaging? You’d think a little bubble wrap lined package would have been thought of by now, like bubble mailers. Why are batteries so hard to get out of their packaging? Have any of those little stinkers ever opened the way they are supposed to? Just put the damn things in a regular box!
*Google ads drive me insane. I can look up something on my phone or computer and the very same day I start getting ads on Facebook (and elsewhere) on that same item. Several times, I was talking to Dad about a certain item and lo and behold, I started getting ads on Facebook. Were they listening to us talking? I never looked it up on my phone or computer. I never looked at the product on Amazon or anywhere else. We just talked about it. Creepy.
*Why do we put celebrities on a pedestal? Why do we listen to what they say but not our doctors, our mothers, or someone else? You don’t know the celebrity personally so how would you know if they’re telling the truth? I have my favorite celebrities, don’t get me wrong, but I’m not going to live my life according to Johnny Depp or Al Pacino.
*Schools have rules against fighting…OK fine. What about when your kid is being bullied? I mean, physically bullied? Don’t you want your child to defend himself? I taught my kids that if someone threw the first punch, then go for it. I didn’t care what the damn school’s rules were! Kids have the right to defend themselves! Instead, they get in trouble for fighting and the bully wins…and continues to bully.
*I will never understand the insane amounts of make up young girls wear these days! I can’t stand when I walk by someone and all I smell is make up. That’s just gross. These girls can have the prettiest face but they cover it up with goop!
*I don’t understand these telemarketers who leave voice mail messages like, “We’d like to talk to you about our products. Please call us at 1-800-555-5555.” Seriously? If you can’t even tell me the products you want to talk to me about, why the hell would I want to call you back? Those numbers get blocked.
*17 commercials during one break while watching a show? Those commercials aren’t going to make me buy a damn thing. They piss me off, and/or annoy the crap out of me. Most of them are the stupidest things I’ve ever seen. I can’t believe anyone would buy a product based on seeing a commercial. A commercial might remind me to put something on my list that may or may not be what they’re advertising. A commercial might make me do a little research, say on the advertised vehicle IF I was in the market for a new car. Same thing goes for insurance commercials. If you’re not in the market for something, why would you pay any attention to the commercial? They need to save the money they spend on ads and pay their employees more! There’s a novel concept!
*Conspiracy theories. You’ve got to be a few fries short of a happy meal to believe the theories out there. Do I completely trust the government? No, especially not now with Tweet-y in office, but to believe that everything is a cover-up is ridiculous. Do you realize how many people would have to keep their big mouths shut in order to pull off a major conspiracy/plot/assassination? People are just not that good at keeping secrets and I still believe that most people have more integrity than that.
Well, there ya go. It would probably be safe to say that some of the things that make no sense to me would be on your list, too! I bet you could add a few, as well!
I’ll bet this isn’t going to be the post you thought it would be!
We have become spoiled brats. We are destroying the planet, ignoring climate change, bullying people from other cultures, not treasuring other forms of life, etc. We listen to celebrities instead of experts. We believe conspiracies. We refuse to believe science over some nit-wit who hasn’t the brains God gave a turkey. The list goes on. We have done this to ourselves. We have created a planet where ‘crazy’ has landed and has taken on a life of its own.
I say we break away from that crazy and create our own crazy. What better way to keep from going completely bat shit crazy than by creating our own ‘crazy’? Wait. Did that make sense? Bear with me.
So many people have forgotten how to enjoy their lives and have let depression and anxiety take control – I’m guilty of this myself. It’s not easy to control it. Mental illness is no freakin’ joke, but we should try and relax and find some fun ways to reduce the crazy in our lives by going a little…crazy. Just let it fly. Your imagination is your only limit.
Today’s post is all about some crazy ideas to help make your days of social distancing a bit more fun. Grab everyone in your household and create some activities together.
Here are 16 ways that I have come up with to go a little crazy and have some fun!
If you’re out n’ about getting essentials, wear your mask. To make wearing that mask a little more fun, just try sticking your tongue out at people as they pass by. You could even mouth certain things (if you know what I mean) behind that mask and no one would be the wiser!
Laugh maniacally at no one or nothing in particular in stores and all the way to the car. People will think you’re nuts but you’ll be releasing all kinds of crazy stress and anxiety.
Make a video. Pretend you’re the sole survivor of a deadly virus and your video is your story. Be creative and emotional. Don’t forget to add a bit of paranoia.
Read a survival guide and invite your spouse and children to go on an adventure in your backyard. Pitch a tent and create the atmosphere of the wilderness. Try to survive the entire day without TV, devices, and other modern conveniences. Pack a few buckets with ice and food items for the day. Whole foods – foods that you would find in the wilderness if you were really on a survival mission. Fill a bucket with water and use a ladle to drink. Try it! It could be fun!
Write a journal or an online blog. Write about the stupidity of others, your adventures of survival, or anything you like. Be creative and make shit up as you go, all while keeping your identity a secret.
Have a “Musical” day! Sing…everything! Just sing. Sing your conversations, your questions…to your spouse, your kids. Encourage them to sing back! It doesn’t have to sound good. It only needs to be fun! Add in a little expressive dance and what a blast you could have!
If you get angry or upset with someone, just bark. Bark like a dog. Leave them wondering what the hell is wrong with you!
Dye your hair the craziest color you can find! Don’t worry, it will fade. You can use the less permanent hair coloring kits. Do the entire family! Be a rainbow of crazy!
Write a letter to your future self. Tell your story; be creative and seal it away in an envelope. Decide when to mail it to yourself; 3 months from now, 6 months? Your choice. Be surprised when you open it on the selected date. If you’re like me, you will have forgotten what you wrote!
Hide canned goods (or whatever you like) all over the house for the family to find at random times. Act like you have no idea how it got there. You could even make it a whodunit game!
Create your own weird language and see if your family can decipher what you’re trying to say! No clues in your native tongue, just your weird made-up language!
Wear your shoes on the wrong feet and see how long it takes the rest of the clan to notice!
Create a game show and give it a unique name. Invite your family to play. Give away strange prizes such as toothpaste, baby carrots, a spoon, etc. Your imagination is your limit!
Have a costume day! Dress up as your favorite cartoon character, or whatever your strange heart desires! See how creative your family can be!
Create a class for your kids to take at home! A cooking class, rock n roll high school, movie trivia, how to bathe the dog, whatever you might be good at could make a great class! Make it as silly as you like.
If all else fails, hit the bottle. Get drunk. Pass out. Maybe in your drunken state you’ll come up with crazier ideas to make life interesting! (Just kidding, really. Be safe. Drink alcohol responsibly!)
There you have it, folks! 16 ways to go crazy without going stark-raving mad! While you’re working on these things, I have angry aliens in my backyard waiting to be fed. I hope they like ketchup. Snort!
This week’s Funnies are all about the moods we experience! I know I’ve been moody AF the last month because I am sick to death of the current affairs in this country. I know I am not alone. As if it’s not bad enough to deal with the everyday moodiness that comes with having spouses, toddlers, teenagers, bosses, and co-workers!!
Here’s to all of us and our many moods; from the good moods to the ‘better not even look at me moods’ because we all experience them!
I don’t know about you all, but I’m not appreciating this new block editor that WordPress is switching to! It’s so awkward and I there are a few things I can’t figure out how to do yet, so bear with me over the next few (hundred) posts while I get it all figured out. Ugh.
I hope you enjoyed this week’s collection! I know there are so many of them but I couldn’t decide on which ones to use and I thought, ah what the heck!
Being Aunt Debbie 