Tag Archives: medications

Being Pissed Off Seems To Be My Current and Long-Standing Mood

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I’m just about ready…no I take that back. I am ready to punch someone in the throat. Ok, so I won’t act on my urge to do that but still…

Early this month, I ordered refills for 2 of my medications. The 2 that I need the most. They are for nerve pain and pain/inflammation. It’s a struggle for me to go out when I need to go pick them up so the pharmacy mails them to me. The pharmacy provides this service at no charge to me and I appreciate that but I also appreciate receiving my meds in the mail when they are shipped out! This month, those 2 meds were lost in the mail. This is not an isolated incident.

This happened a few months back, too. I had to get an emergency script for one of my meds because I am not supposed to stop taking them abruptly. When I did, I experienced sleep disturbances. I did not want to do that again!

This pharmacy was good in the beginning. I had absolutely no problems with them. Then all of a sudden, there was a little issue, then another…and another. When I complained to them (and I did it nicely) they always had some excuse. Blah, blah, blah. There’s one thing I can’t stand (aside from liars and thieves and DJT) and that’s incompetence. Just do your fucking job, will ya? I asked them for a tracking number so the USPS could help me locate the package and I was told that they don’t keep track of the tracking numbers and that they aren’t responsible once packages leave the pharmacy. Ok, I get that. But I never had an ounce of trouble with Walmart when they sent my meds in the mail. Never once in many years did anything get lost in the mail.

I transferred my meds to a different pharmacy. Old pharmacy didn’t send them all over. Figures. Incompetence. Between me and the new pharmacy calling both the clinic and the old pharmacy, we finally got them all transferred. But I still had a problem. Since those 2 meds were already filled this month I couldn’t refill them again unless I paid for them myself. I was trying to avoid that because I’m on a fixed income.

I called the clinic and tried to explain the situation to the nurse on duty but she was fixated on the scripts being transferred to the new pharmacy. I told her to “forget about that for a minute and listen. This is a separate issue!” I tried to explain that I am rationing those 2 meds, which I shouldn’t have to do. (Thankfully, I had some extras that accumulated because I order a few days early each month.) I was nearly out and in a fucking panic because I cannot function without those 2 meds! I wasn’t getting through to her so I told her “neverfuckingmind” and I hung up. So much for getting an emergency script! I called the new pharmacy and they said I could order the refills early but I’d have to pay out of pocket. I was trying to avoid that but ok, if I have to I have to.

I picked my meds up the following day. It cost me over $50! I’m hoping this new pharmacy is competent and that I have no problems with them. So far, they are happy to help and do what they’re supposed to do.

I swear, I am in this constant state of “WTH is going to happen now?” or “Can’t anything be easy?” or “Everyone can just suck the big one.” I anticipate having problems and I’m pleasantly surprised when things go smoothly. However, I stay cautiously satisfied. Does that make sense? It is rare that things go smoothly.

Hearing DJT on what I refer to as Trump TV, is nauseating at best. I can’t stand the sound of his voice. I can’t stand his face. He makes me so angry and it automatically sets my mood into an ugliness that I can’t even stand. If I could just get Dad to watch something besides the news…

S.R.M.

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Stark.

Raving.

Mad.

Stark Raving Mad: informal, meaning completely insane.

Yes, I am going stark raving mad. I know. I signed up for this. Dad will be 88 years old in February of 2025. I get it. I expected things would be a bit nuts as he got older but holy bat shit, Robin! 

Some days are better than others. Some days there are no issues at all. Today? Ugh. Today is one of those days where you just want to pull your damn hair out and scream. 

It started first thing this morning. I just woke up and I saw on my weather app that we are supposed to have thunderstorms on Tuesday. I told Dad that I hope I don’t lose our internet/wifi (we have a satellite phone) because I am expecting an important phone call from the SSA regarding my SSI benefit. I’d just hate to have to call them back – you know how it is. They leave you on hold for 40 minutes before they actually get to you and then they end up transferring your call to another department, and so on. Anyway, Dad said he hoped for no storms as well because he might miss his call from the Husqvarna folks regarding his mower. They are supposed to call before they come out to pick it up for repairs. I reminded Dad of what he told me last week. He said that he told them if they can’t get ahold of us then to just come pick it up. He said he never told me that. He told me what they said about calling before coming. I told him that yes, he told me that but he also told me that he told them if they couldn’t get ahold of us then to just come pick it up. He argued with me until I just dropped it. I try not to get that “I’m right and you’re wrong” attitude because there have been times that I have been wrong, but he always does this to me about so many things! I can tell him he already saw a certain movie and he’ll argue that he didn’t and swear up and down that he did not. He actually gets pissed off! So, I just let him watch the damn movie over again. No big deal but then about 30 minutes into the damn movie he tells me that I was right. He did see that movie afterall. Ugh.

Anyway, after lunch we had the same discussion we had last week. Dad had an appointment with his Cardiologist who happens to be Japanese with an accent that is hard to understand unless you concentrate very hard. When Dad came out from his appointment, he told me that the doctor wants him to take acidophilus to help lower his blood pressure. I’m look at him dumbfounded and I tell him that can’t be right because acidophilus is a probiotic and it’s for your gut. Good grief. He argued with me. It was listed on his printout. The next thing on the printout was Amlodapine (sp?) which he already takes so then we assumed that the doctor was just going to give him another script to take another dose at a different time during the day. But there was no explanation on the printout and Dad said the doctor didn’t say anything about that. I’m sure this doctor is a good one but there’s always so much confusion – and I’m not sure if it’s the doctor’s accent, or my Dad, or both.

A day after his appointment, Dad gets an email from Humana telling him that his new script for Isosorbide Mononitrate ER was being processed. Why the fuck didn’t the Cardiologist’s office put that on the printout like they did the acidophilus? You’d think anything new would be put on the list with any new instructions but I guess that’s just too much to ask. We had both forgotten about the Isosorbide Mononitrate ER today, but eventually I remembered and then he argued that he never got anything from Humana about any new medication! Holy balls. Anyway, we got it all straightened out but what’s next? 

My brain is exhausted all the time. I not only have to deal with my pain and mobility issues, which are constantly in my brain, right there (pointing to my forehead) not letting me forget, as if I could, but I have to keep up with Dad and his meds and his this, that, and the other thing. And he wonders why I stay up until 1am every night. I need those hours (3 to be exact) after he goes to bed, so that I can relax, recharge, and dump all of the shit from my brain into the atmosphere. Lol. Otherwise, I won’t sleep. During those hours I don’t have to worry about him because he’s in bed. I don’t have to be on high alert. He has a pee can in his room so he doesn’t get out of bed. I don’t have to worry about him falling down or bumping his head or spilling something…or some…thing… 

Wish me luck!

What’s Eating Aunt Debbie?

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Well, let me tell you. PAIN.

Last week, I called in my prescription medications. I was waiting for my NP to approve one script that had no more refills and then I was going to call Walmart and have them ship my meds as I normally do.

Stupid me didn’t realize I was nearly out of my pain medication! That was late Friday. I started to panic because we were expecting snow on Saturday. I couldn’t go out and pick up my meds in person because I didn’t know how much snow we would actually get. I called Walmart yesterday to have them ship; they will go out today.

I had 2 pain pills left, one to be taken every 12 hours. So, I’ve had to ration. I took one Saturday night and my pain level wasn’t too bad. I saved my last one for tonight. I only took Tylenol Arthritis last night and my pain level is UP. With any luck, FedEx will come tomorrow! Usually, they’re pretty quick.

Then, I began to panic again because my daughter mentioned MLK Day and wondered if FedEx would even run today! I googled it and apparently, FedEx and UPS both will run, while the USPS observes the holiday.

The sun is out, trying to melt the snow and the road looks pretty good, but I’d probably get stuck in the yard if I tried to get the car out. (We don’t have a traditional driveway.) It’s 44 degrees at the moment but it seems much colder when there’s snow on the ground.

Wish me luck. I can’t function well with no pain meds to dull the pain.

P.S. Don’t think that I am an addict because I am not. There’s a difference between addiction and dependency. I am dependent on pain meds to be able to function. There is no euphoria involved. I have to make that clarification because “a friend” had accused me of being a drug addict some time ago. That person is no longer in my circle.

The Withdrawal, Oops.

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I’ve had some sleep problems this past couple of months. It became evident to me just 2 days ago (because apparently, I’m a bit slow) that my sleeplessness was a result of medication withdrawal. I had been taking a medication for nerve pain twice a day and decided that I would go off of it because I really didn’t think it was helping much. I didn’t just stop cold turkey. I knew to reduce slowly. I Started taking it once a day instead of twice and did that for about 2 months. Had some restlessness at night. Had a bit of itchiness. It never occurred to me that it was the medication, or rather the lack of…

Then Tuesday night before bed, I was lazy and didn’t take one at all. I figured what the heck. It’s just one night and I want to stop taking it anyway.

That night I was awake all night. I itched all night long. I felt like I had bugs. I never fell asleep at all! I was up at 5am. At this point, I had been awake since Monday morning. I tried to take a nap. Nothing happened. I was tired and I needed to sleep but something was preventing me from sleeping.

Late Wednesday night, before bed, I remembered I hadn’t taken that medication Tuesday night. I looked up the symptoms of withdrawal. Bingo. Duh me.

Sleep disturbances and frantic itching. (Among other very serious symptoms, so I was lucky.)

I made sure to take the medication when I went to bed Wednesday night. I slept well, with no itching. I took it again in the morning. Back to twice a day now, and I think I’ll stay ON the medication because my pain level has improved a bit already. I guess it WAS helping after all.

Slept like a baby last night….without the bedwetting, of course!

baby-303068_640

Wings, Crunch!

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Yesterday, Dad and I headed out to the nearest Walgreen’s, which isn’t very near I might add. He needed a refill on his antibiotic ointment and he had a new script for an oral antibiotic – both for the cellulitis on his lower left leg. I had been telling him for weeks, if not months, to go to the doctor and have that rash looked at. It started as what looked like a bug bite and then developed into a round rash, the size of a silver dollar. It just kept growing and growing, until it was covering nearly his entire lower leg. He just wouldn’t go to the doctor. He kept telling me, “I have an appointment in October.” Um. Ok. So what? When I took him for his Lifeline screening last week they told him he needs to have that looked at because it might be infected….so then he decided it was a good idea to go to the doctor! Geez. Anyway, I digress.

At Walgreen’s, we dropped off the new script and the old, to have them filled. We then went on to have lunch. We decided on Buffalo Wild Wings because it was half-price Tuesday! We each ordered a small wing basket (10 wings each) with a side of fries. We couldn’t eat them all; I only ate 3 of mine and the fries. I think Dad ate 4 and some fries. We always end up taking some home, which is great because then I don’t have to worry about making anything for dinner. I think anyone would agree that that’s always a good deal! We asked the server for a couple of boxes to take our food home in and then we were on our way, back to Walgreen’s to pick up Dad’s meds.

On the way out to the parking lot, Dad dropped one of the boxes. Ugh! It just happened to be mine. The box popped open and a few of my wings hit the asphalt! OMG. Dad scooped them up and put them back in the box, getting wing sauce all over his hands. Good grief. Good thing I grabbed a few wet wipes off the table! But OMG, my wings! He felt bad and said I could have his but I didn’t want him to feel bad or for him to not have any wings for later. I told him not to worry about it because I could rinse them off. After all, I have hot sauce at home that I can coat them with after I rinse them off. Ugh. My wings!! (Maybe with extra crunch!)

At Walgreen’s the lady informed us that Dad’s insurance won’t cover the cream until the following day. He was already out of the cream. The oral antibiotic couldn’t be filled until the day after next. So, this was a wasted trip and we have to go back on Friday to pick them up. Bureaucratic bull squirt is all it is.

On the way home, we stopped to get gas. The screen on the gas pump said, “Thank you for shopping with us…..” on the first screen and then the next screen said, “…today.” We had to chuckle about it because of course, it’s today! Why even say, “today?” It would never say, “Thank you for shopping with us last Thursday” or “Thank you for shopping with us tomorrow.” Of course, it’s today!

I find humor in the dumbest things!

Oh, and I rinsed my wings off pretty good, coated them in my own hot sauce, heated them and you would have never known they had been dropped on the asphalt! Ha!