If My Cats Had Human Voices

When I talk to my cats, but mostly when Dad talks to them, I use a different voice for each cat and answer for them. Sounds weird, but it sure makes us laugh!

I got to thinking about the celebrity voices that might fit my cats’ personalities. This is what I came up with:

Kitty, our senior cat.

Kitty, our senior cat, would definitely have the voice of Katharine Hepburn. Kitty has that head-tremor thing going on, sort of. Her head is always bopping around, like a bobble head you’d put in the rear window of your car. And she’s old, like Hepburn in On Golden Pond.


Honey Bear, Southern Belle

Honey Bear would definitely have a Southern accent. I don’t know why but it just seems right for her. She’d be a little bit of a ding bat and have a lot to say. She would definitely sound like Charlene (Jean Smart) from Designing Women.


Alice, silent but knowledgeable.

Alice would have the voice of Marisa Tomei from the movie, My Cousin Vinny. Why? Because Alice knows a lot and if she could talk she’d have a lot of important information to pass along. I think she’d be a bit of a tattle-tale, to tell you the truth!


Jack, tough guy and coward.

Jack was the hardest to figure out. He’s a tough guy, picking fights with the ladies of the house but he’s a big freakin’ coward if someone comes over or just knocks on the door. I chose James Cagney for Jack’s voice. I think it fits. Cagney was a tough guy. If you’ve seen any of his movies you know what I mean.

But then a scene from my favorite Cagney movie fit with Jack’s cowardly side. In this scene of Angels With Dirty Faces, Rocky Sullivan heads to the electric chair but previously his childhood friend, now Priest, begs Rocky for one last favor. You see, there are a group of punk kids who admire Rocky but Father Connolly doesn’t want the boys to follow Rocky’s same path. He doesn’t want the boys to see Rocky as a hero but instead, as a coward.

So, those are the voices my cats would have if they had human voices. What voices would you tag your pets with, if they had human voices?

Friday’s Funnies – Cats Are A**holes

Yes, they are. If you own cats or have owned them in the past, then you can relate. For the most part, my 4 furbabies are well-behaved. Except for Jack. He’s the asshole of the bunch. I sometimes call him JackASS. He’s perfectly fine to sleep all day, and then sleep beside me on the bed as I’m reading before bed…but as soon as the light goes out and I start to doze off, he decides it’s time for some shenanigans.

There must be a mouse in my closet because Jack was digging around in there (2 nights in a row now) but as I mentioned, he waits until I start to doze off and then he starts misbehaving! He gets tired of that and then he chases poor Honey Bear and that poor girl cowers in fear! He’s not trying to play. He’s being mean. I have to go after him with a fly swatter! He pulled that shit 3 times last night. I’m thinking it’s time for another vest. His old vest doesn’t fit him anymore. I used to put it on him when he behaved aggressively towards the others. That’s the only way I could train him. It took 3 years to get him integrated completely with the others! It worked, but now all of a sudden, he doesn’t like Honey Bear.

I’m shocked (and I bet you are, too) that I haven’t dedicated a Friday’s Funnies post to only cats, so here it is. The proof that cats can be assholes! I hope you enjoy!!


You thought the dog was the one who ate your homework?



On, off. On, off. On, off. Dis be pretty neat!



The new way to say hello!



Shenanigans commence!



You gotta go, you gotta go! Besides, you poop in a porcelain bowl so why can’t I?



Couldn’t decide which one to use!



They want outside but then…



Those blinds will never be the same…and neither will the new ones, and the new ones after that.



Imprint of the ancient house cat.



Screen doors get the same abuse as the blinds.



I think cats purposely knock their toys under things because they enjoy watching us struggle trying to retrieve the dang things!



That fish lucked out when the family cat thought he should knock it off the table!



If your cat does this, then he’s trying to tell you that you watch too much tv.



Oh, hai. What are you guys doing?



As long as the cat is warm…



I stole your lunch. Couldn’t find any meat.



The cat’s new bed.



Don’t dare me, Susan.






This guy doesn’t like that you’re leaving, so he’s going to wipe his ass on your windshield.



Clean the box, Susan!



What? It’s not a new bed? It’s nice and warm!



Will these hatch if I sit here long enough?


I wanna play, too!


This half is not as warm as the other half.



You come at me, I show you the teef and claws!



Cat likes to do puzzles, too!



I’ll unplug it, man. Don’t yell at me!



How about a little tail?



Missing elastic ponytail bands? Ask your cat where they are.



Cats don’t like selfies!



I want some nom nom, too! Dat smell good!



There was an explosion. I swear, I didn’t do it!



The Elusive Underwear Bandit strikes again!



Take that, human! Put some pants on!



Sorry, had a party last night.


And that, my furry little friends, is why humans do this to you:









So, there ya have it! An entire Friday’s Funnies post dedicated to the domestic cat, who were once worshipped by the ancient Egyptians. I don’t think they’ve advanced, do you?

I hope you have a great weekend! Stay warm, stay safe, and stay awesome!

Aunt Debbie





Life Is Better With A Cat

It’s absolutely true except when they weave between your feet while you’re trying to put groceries away! One of these days I’m going to fall and as if that’s not bad enough in my condition, I just might land on one of them. That would absolutely kill me.

Another exception is when you have a floor scattered with grocery bags and they’re screaming at you to feed them because you’re an hour and a half late to feed them dinner. God knows they are starving to death with only a partial bowl of kibble left!

I suppose there are other reasons that cats (or any pet) can be a pain in the butt but we love them all the same. You know what makes it all better? The lovins. The purrs. The slow-blink stares. The moments you just get lucky enough to catch on video, like this silly moment of Jack chasing his tail. He stopped for a minute and I didn’t think he would do it anymore since I grabbed my phone but he did for just a second. It’s really hard to get them doing cute or funny things on video. It’s always easy to get photos of them being cute and innocent while they’re sleeping though.

Kitty Comfort

Well, I’ve finished another project. I’ve been slowly making throws for everyone in my immediate family. This one is for one of my nieces. It took about 2 days to do each block, well that’s not actually true. It took me several hours over a 2-day period to do each block. I love these kitties! They’re so cute!

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I can’t tell you how many rows on each block I had to frog (rip out) because I screwed up the count somehow. Oh, that shit drives me insane!

The last project I finished went pretty quickly. It’s for my “other daughter” who is expecting her 3rd child in September. I hope she likes it.


My next project is for my first born grandson. He’s into baseball so it’ll be baseball themed! It’ll say, “Take Me Out To The Ballgame” and will be in his fave team’s colors. I can’t wait to get started on it!

Friday’s Funnies – My Faves This Week

There’s this woman named Susan. She’s a real piece of work.


She’s very lazy…


She’s a habitual liar…


She’s not a good photographer…


Her co-workers want to throw things at her…


Or spill hot drinks on her…


She tells them how to do their jobs…


Old people are sick of her shit…


The Mafia has her on a short leash…


She thinks she has all the answers…

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She thinks she so perfect…


Oh no she didn’t!


She tries to tell people how to live their lives…


She’s just a bossy bitch…


She’s also an alcoholic!


Babies are even sick of her shit!


Small children, too!



She confuses dogs and makes them sad…


Cats are not fond of Susan, either.


She’s not very helpful…



And we all know Grumpy Cat has to be sick of her, too!


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Her husband even left her…


This girl is LUCKY!


Looks like this is the only person who actually likes poor ol’ Susan!


Well, there’s Friday’s Funnies, starring SUSAN. I hope these gave you a chuckle. I wanted to do something a bit different!

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Aunt Debbie