Sarcasm Here, Eye Roll There

Here’s a little quote I shared on social media this morning:

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After I read the quote, I reread it. Then I realized that me being ‘nice’ about things when someone continually pushed my buttons and pissed me off, got me nowhere. Instead of calling that person out, and for the sake of being nice, I let it fester inside until it had nowhere to go except OUT! When it did come out, it was a little at a time. Sarcasm here, eye roll there. A little dig here and a little dig there.

In the end, there I was finding out that I was being judged all along by someone who didn’t have their shit together any better than I did! So, if I have to be a bitch now to protect my inner peace, you bet that’s what I will be!

Amid financial woes, health issues, and the daily stresses of life, I still feel more at peace now. I’m a good person, but that doesn’t mean that I have to be nice all the time! No more build-up of frustration and feeling unworthy. People can judge me based on their perception of my disability, or my life but I don’t have to be nice about it!

Lord, Have Mercy On My Tired Soul

It all started with a flat tire. I figured Dad would just call AAA in the next day or so…more like weeks later because he never wants to call anyone for anything. Ugh. My DIL sent someone over to change the tire for us the next morning. I wasn’t even awake yet but that’s ok, I knew I could take a nap later. So, here’s this skinny girl out there trying to get the lug nuts off and one just won’t budge. I was shocked that she could get any of them off, honestly. Well, she wasn’t able to get that last one so she left. 

The aggravation started when Dad decided to call AAA. Not that hard, right? Well, he called the tire shop in town first which was ridiculous because he would still have to call AAA to get it covered and he knew this. I told him that, too. The guy at the tire shop told him the same thing but if the lug nut was stripped then his shop had no way of getting it off. Seriously? So, Dad calls AAA. But he doesn’t. He ends up calling the tire shop again because that’s the business card he had in his hand. I asked him, “Are you calling AAA,” and he nods his head. He gets the tire shop and they tell him again that he has to call AAA first. Good grief. 

He calls AAA, finally. The line was busy the first time. Dad sat there for 3 minutes listening to the busy signal. I could hear it from where I sat. I timed him. After 3 minutes I asked him why he was listening to the busy signal. He said he was waiting to see if someone would realize he was trying to call. I said, “Dad, it doesn’t work that way!” Anyway, he calls again and gets a real person. He explains the situation with the lug nut. They said they would make some calls to find the right shop to do the job, and they would call him back within the hour. That’s good, right? But Dad gave them the wrong address and the wrong phone number! Before he could hang up I told him to verify the address and phone number. I could hear the woman’s voice on the other end and she repeated the address and phone number correctly. At least they had it on file correctly. In the meantime, someone else shows up, who Dad believes to be from a shop that AAA sent. It wasn’t. We found out the gal that was here first thing had called a friend of hers who lived in the area. He was an older man. 

While Dad was outside talking to the older man, the phone rang but I didn’t get to it in time. It was another tire shop that AAA contacted. The man left a voicemail and said he was on his way. I would have called him back right away but I wasn’t sure if the older man would get that blasted lug nut loose or not. So, I waited. 

The older man managed to get the lug nut loose and put the donut on the car. Before Dad even got back in the house, another guy showed up from the first shop that Dad had called. Dad just assumed that AAA called them. (They told Dad that they had no way of removing a stripped lug nut, so why send someone out anyway?) 

When Dad came inside, I told him about the call from Ed’s tire shop and he said, “He was just here.” I said, “No. It couldn’t have been because the call came in when the older guy was out there talking to you.” He told me he didn’t know that guy’s name but it was someone from Ron’s. I told him that not enough time had passed for Ed’s Shop guy to travel 30 miles. He just wasn’t getting it. He kept saying, “The guy from Ron’s was just here.” I told him again, “It was ED’s Shop that called, Dad. Not Ron’s.” He said, “Oh.” Finally getting it. I told him he’d better call him if the tire situation was taken care of, so they don’t waste their time and gas. He said he would but he had no way of knowing their number. Holy crap on a cracker. I gave him the number from the voicemail and he called. Good grief. 

It was suggested to me that I take over and make all of the calls, getting Dad’s permission to represent him. I would do that but Dad needs to keep his mind working. He does absolutely nothing all day but watch tv. He washes the few lunch dishes we have most days and helps with the laundry but that’s not exercising his brain. I am having a hard time taking care of myself, let alone him and everything else. Dad can’t let his brain go! It’s getting worse and worse. He won’t read a book. He won’t do crossword puzzles. He won’t do jigsaw puzzles with me. He won’t get involved with other seniors. He says, “I hate old people.” He won’t do anything but sit there and watch the news, all day long. I could make it less stressful on myself but is that helping him? 

I won’t put Dad in a nursing home unless and when it’s necessary. I can’t help but think about when I put my Granny in a nursing home. She was there for 2 weeks and was having a good time but then she got sick and was in the hospital for about a week. When she went back to the nursing home, she was there for a few days and then she passed away. I know in my heart that she got sick because she wasn’t used to being around so many germs. Dad is rarely around anyone but me. Nursing homes are chock-full of germs. I know. I used to work in one!

There are other things I/we could do like getting someone in to help but in this old house that’s damn near falling apart? That’s all I need, is some do-gooder coming in and reporting to Senior Services that we have no business living in this house. Our new house isn’t anywhere near being completed, so where the hell would we go? Are they going to foot the bill to not only find a new house for us to live in but move us in as well? Hahaha.

Well, as Granny used to say, “It’ll all come out in the wash!” Until then, I’ll just fake it ’til I make it, as they say or just grin and bear it.

What’s Eating Aunt Debbie?

I’ve been trying to find time all week to post but as my old Granny used to say, “If it ain’t one thing, it’s another.” And that sure is the truth! Today, the dreaded flat tire. Thankfully, it’s in the yard and I’m not stranded on the road somewhere. Anyway, it’s been quite a while since I did a What’s Eating Aunt Debbie? post so it’s about time, yes? There’s a lot on my mind these days…but now that I have some time to actually sit and write, I can’t think of everything I wanted to say! Go figure.

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I’m so sick and tired of the lies and liars in politics these days. Namely, Donald J. Trump. Haitian immigrants are NOT eating cats and dogs for fuck’s sake! There are no reports, no evidence of this happening! What the hell is wrong with DJT? Aside from being the most ignorant man on the planet, and without a moral compass, I mean. Lies like this tend to cause harm to others. In this case, immigrants are being targeted by Trump supporters. When will they see what a lying sack of shit he is? Or do they know and they just don’t care because it gives them an excuse to be terrible people? And that JD Vance guy is a piece of work, isn’t he? He’s just as bad a DJT if not worse. I know no one’s perfect. ALL politicians put a spin on things. ALL politicians lie but when everything that comes out of their mouths is a flat-out lie, or misinformation/disinformation it’s just unacceptable! Let’s get back to “normal” ok? Get rid of DJT once and forever! If we elect that man as POTUS we deserve everything he dishes out. Please don’t throw away your vote. Vote BLUE.

Not too long ago, I was told that I should be able to be friends with people regardless of their political views. To a certain extent, that is correct. For example, I can be friends with someone of a different political party with different views but if they are perpetuating the misinformation and LIES, then I’m done with them. Spewing hate, racism, bigotry, and LIES tell me what kind of person they are. End of story.

What’s up with the Postal Service? I am sick to death of waiting and waiting for packages to arrive. Informed Delivery might tell me I have a package expected to arrive on a certain date but it actually arrives 3 or 4 days later. When I mail a package it takes forever for it to reach its destination. I don’t know if it’s the Postal Service here in SW MO or if it’s all over. We pay ridiculous shipping prices (that includes stamps!) so I think we should get what we pay for, don’t you? If we pay for Priority Mail (prices starting at $9.25 lb. for 2-3 business days) then we should expect delivery in 2-3 business days. I’ve shipped packages via Priority Mail (from SW MO) to my daughter in TN and had the package end up in FL and stuck there for a week! When it finally leaves FL it goes to Kansas City, MO, and sits for several days before it finally gets to my daughter. There is no excuse for this kind of service! I know shit happens sometimes, but come on! Similar things happen all the time. I just want the USPS to “shit or get off the pot,” as my old Granny used to say.

Are you a Facebook user? There’s always something going wrong or at least wonky. I check my Being Aunt Debbie page and see 2 notifications that tell me my “scheduled post has been published” but yet even after reading them, they don’t go away. One is from 2 weeks ago! I tried to delete them, clear them, and mark them as read but still, they don’t go away. Why doesn’t anything work the way it’s supposed to?

Yesterday, on the anniversary of 9/11, someone asked, “Why did the Twin Towers burn when they were made of steel?” I couldn’t believe the stupidity in that question! The Towers were not made entirely of steel. The framing was made of steel. But regardless of how much steel was used in building the Towers, there was still drywall, curtains, carpeting, flooring, furniture, paper products, and numerous other items that freakin’ BURN! Plus, you’ve got JET FUEL that exploded when it hit the buildings! Can you imagine how HOT that burned? If you fracture the structure or the foundation of any building IN THAT WAY you damn right the building will burn and come crashing down! Conspiracy Theorists, shut the fuck up already!

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So, that will be the end of my rant for today. What’s eating you, my friends?

C’est La Vie…

Another one bites the dust, as they say. I’ve had to let another friend go. Was it my fault? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe fault lies with both.

Do I push people away? Yes, I suppose I do but I prefer to say, “I let them go,” because I’m not the only one doing the pushing. I don’t always say something to them because it’s subtle and I know the person is just trying to help.

First of all, with no real understanding of my pain and its cause, people have a tendency to want to help. They offer advice and remedies; perhaps supplements, or exercises. I get tired of trying to explain. It’s not like I haven’t tried nearly everything under the sun and within my budget and ability, to help myself. Nothing helps because it’s severe bone and joint damage/pain I suffer from. Nothing is going to help except for knee replacements. That’s an entirely different post.

I get tired of disagreeing with people. People who bring up the same things in conversation, knowing full well that I disagree. It’s like they are looking for an argument. Then they make me feel as though I can’t question what they have said. I think it’s healthy to question things and if you can’t disagree with someone, what the hell is the point?

I don’t like filtering everything I say all the time. I watch what I say when I’m in public or when it’s someone I don’t l know well, but constantly having to worry about what to say or how I should say it, makes it hard to have a discussion without tension.

I’m not a negative person but I have bad days, some worse than others. Some people don’t recognize that I’m more a realist than anything else. I prefer to see things as they are, not how I want them to be. That doesn’t make me a negative person but there I was being told how negative I was all the time.

Having a gift (my cookbook) declined with, “I don’t want it,” is hurtful. No matter how nicely you put it.

Sometimes, I feel provoked. Knowing perfectly well how I feel about YouTube “information” for example, but still trying to push it at me like it’s fact drives me insane! My bad for not stopping it as soon as it started.

When I reach a certain point, I start to lash out. Then, when the other person lashes out, I fall back into the “everything is my fault” mindset, that stems from my 12 years in an emotionally and mentally abusive relationship. So, I apologize. I try to explain. I apologize again. Afterward, I’m left with more anger because I realize that I was being baited in the first place. Baiting denied, of course. But it was like being pulled back into routine manipulation, as I experienced so long ago. Not doing that again, for anyone.

I guess that’s why my circle is small. When I’m with other friends, my mood is elevated and I feel less stress. Things are positive and fun, relaxing. I don’t feel exhausted afterward.

So, the end is the end. I feel sad but I feel peace at the same time. I don’t know how else to explain it. I’m heartbroken to have ended a friendship, but at the same time I feel peace in knowing that I won’t have potential conflict and disagreement slapping me in the face anymore.

C’est la vie.

aunt-debbie

Choices

We all have to make choices in our lives. I think we can agree on that. But do WE have the right to force our thoughts or beliefs on others when they don’t make the same choice we would make? No, we do not. The choices others make is none of our business. Of course, I’m speaking about adults who are mentally capable; not children, not mentally challenged, or anyone else who doesn’t have the ability to make rational and safe decisions. 

So why the heck do others seem to think that another person’s choices are wrong? Just because that choice is not one we would make for ourselves for whatever reason, doesn’t mean that it’s wrong. 

If someone else’s choices are offensive to you, so what? Are your feelings or preferences more important than theirs? I think not. Just stay in your own lane and mind your own business. Let others live their lives and make their own choices. Life is hard enough without someone trying to make you do what they want you to do!

Here are a few quotes that I found that are quite relevant:

Enjoy the rest of your day, my friends. Until next time, 

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