A Weight, Lifted

A few months ago, I made the difficult decision to sell my soap making supplies. This came after I finally realized my motivation was gone. My pain level is to the point that everything I do is a struggle. If I’m going to struggle to get a glass of iced tea, then how the hell am I going to make soap? If I were able-bodied, I would definitely not have given it up.

In January, I began boxing up supplies after I found a buyer. It would take me 2 whole months not just because of my pain level, but also because my supplies were scattered all over the house. Now, by ‘scattered’ I don’t mean strewn everywhere. I live in a small house, so in order to have all the supplies I needed for my soap making, I had to make room. That means a shelf here, a shelf there, a few tubs in the bedroom closet, a rack in the small bedroom, boxes stacked in a corner, etc. I spent a couple hours a few days a week getting things together. I had to box things up in a manner that made sense. Soap base in one box, tools and measuring devices in one box, soap packaging items in another, and so on. I labeled each box. Thankfully, the fragrance oils were already in their own tubs. So were a few other things like soap molds.

Today, after getting everything loaded into my car, I met with my buyer who just happens to be a good friend of mine. I said goodbye to my supplies as I drove away….but a huge wave of relief came over me. I was rather shocked. I never thought that there was anything to that “declutter your life, declutter your mind” crap I’ve heard for years but today, I get it. I GET IT!

As much as I hated to give up my soap making, it was a relief to not have all those supplies in my house, taking up space and not being used. I felt lighter….like a weight has been lifted. I felt like now I’m getting somewhere in this decluttering project! Soon, my sister will come for my incense making supplies and then there will be another wave of relief! I’m looking forward to having only what I/we need and will try my best not to accumulate more stuff…except for yarn!

Note: I will NOT be giving up my yarn stash! Hahaha!

The Worst Chore Ever

I can deal with cleaning clutter, wiping cabinets, organizing, vacuuming, even cleaning toilets. The thing I hate to do the most is DUSTING! I hate it. Seems that no matter what you do, that damn dust always comes back – sometimes the very next day! It’s especially bad when you live out in the country like I do.

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As I’ve mentioned before, I’ve been cleaning and decluttering for the past couple of weeks. It’s rough when you’ve got pain and mobility issues. I do a little, rest a little, do a little more….one chore at a time, and sometimes only one chore a day. Today, I tackled the cube shelving in the laundry room. The dust was so thick under the clutter, even the cats were sneezing!

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I threw away a bunch of stuff I have no idea why I was even saving. Forgot I had it, haven’t used it in years…..why keep it? Some things I saved for the youngn’s. I figure the old air popper, single serve coffee maker, and a set of ceramic canisters could be useful to one of them. I’m not using them after all. No telling what I might find the more I delve into this cleaning and decluttering project – a project I’m not sorry I started, at least not yet.

Someone suggested I put the unwanted stuff in the yard with a “free” sign on it. I might try that later in the Spring. Right now it’s too wet out. I can’t even begin to tell you how many things I’ve tried to give away in the past, absolutely free and no strings attached except it must be picked up – I have even offered to deliver to certain places if I had a reason to go that direction – NO TAKERS. What the heck?? We’re talking old televisions that still worked, chairs, heaters and fans that still worked, adult and children’s clothing in good condition…. The televisions were the old kind but still worked! I figured it’s better than nothing if someone needed a tv to hold them until they could get a better one. I guess I was wrong.

Anyway, I’m taking it day by day. I decide every morning what I’ll tackle that day. Some days I may not even do anything. It might take a year to finish, who knows. I will get it done if it kills me…. I just wish someone else would do the dusting!

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What are your least favorite chores to do?

Operation Catch Up and Clean Up

Two weeks ago, the young woman who took the photos at my son’s wedding passed suddenly. I met her just once, at the wedding. She left behind 2 small children and a grieving husband. This weighed on me terribly even though I really didn’t know her. I just couldn’t stop thinking about her family. It got me thinking….too much. I didn’t sleep well for two nights.

It got me thinking about my own family, my own situation. Aside from my pain and mobility issues, I’m pretty healthy. The thing is, I could pass suddenly, too. I started thinking about what I would be leaving behind if I were to pass suddenly. A cluttered house, that’s what. Since becoming disabled, I’ve not been able to clean as I did when I was younger and able-bodied. I clean, but I haven’t thoroughly cleaned and decluttered in years. 10 years ago, it was impossible to clean as I had my grown children moving in and out of the house with their significant other and/or their children. I had to shuffle belongings from one room to another, shove shit in boxes, hide stuff in corners and closets – all to make room for the extra bodies. When they all flew the coop, I never was able to unbox and put things back because I was having pain and mobility issues. As time went on, the clutter grew because I had nowhere to put things that I actually needed.

The last couple of weeks I’ve been cleaning out drawers, closets and boxes. I’ve been throwing shit away that I haven’t used in years. I’ve been decluttering, slowly. Slowly, this house is becoming a home again….albeit still falling down.

I have to do a little each day, as my pain allows. Today, for instance, I cleaned out 3 kitchen drawers and that’s about all I could do. Yesterday, I cleaned out a plastics cabinet and threw out tons of containers I’ve not used in years. Last week, I cleaned off a huge cube shelf in the living room. You get the picture. Steady as she goes, they say.

I decided some time ago that I would be selling my soap and incense making supplies because I just can’t make those things any longer. I was hoping to be able to again someday, but I’m not sure that day will ever come. Getting those supplies together and boxed up for my buyers has been a major task but I’m getting that done, slowly but surely.

So, it’s been a busy couple of weeks. I hope to be able to relax a little in the near future when I get everything cleaned and uncluttered. It may help unclutter my mind as well…at least a little bit. I won’t have to worry about my family having to deal with the mess I’ve left behind. I can just hear them saying, “What the hell did she save this for?” Face it. We’ve all got things saved in drawers or closets and we’ll ask ourselves the same question especially if we forget why we saved it! Ha! We always have a good reason at the time, am I right?!

Anyway, I’ve been lagging behind in reading all of the wonderful blogs I follow and also on writing in my own blog. Never fear. I will get caught up again! It’s not that I haven’t tried to write. I have, but when I do my mind goes blank. As things become cleaner, decluttered and organized, it will become easier I’m sure.

Until then, please be patient with me!