Category Archives: Humor

The Bear Went Over The Mountain

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When I was a young girl, I was in the Girl Scouts. Every summer, we had what they called “Day Camp” where all the scouts and their troop leaders spent the week camping. Actually, we were picked up each evening to go home and the last day was the only over-nighter. We had fun playing games, doing crafts, singing songs around the campfire and cooking our favorite snacks like S’mores.

One of the songs we sang was ‘The Bear Went Over The Mountain.’ Up until today, I never really knew the correct lyrics and I’m surprised at how different I learned it as a kid in the Girl Scouts. I guess the Girl Scouts changed it to make it a Girl Scout song. The problem is, I could never remember exactly how we sang it back then so I made up my own version. It goes like this:

The bear went over the mountain, the bear went over the mountain, the bear went over the mountain to see what he could see.

He saw a bunch of Girl Scouts, he saw a bunch of Girl Scouts, he saw a bunch of Girl Scouts, and what do you think he did?

He ate up all the Girl Scouts, he ate up all the Girl Scouts, he ate up all the Girl Scouts, and what do you think he did?

He puked up all the Girl Scouts, he puked up all the Girl Scouts, he puked up all the Girl Scouts, and what do you think he did?

I stopped at this point, as I could never think of what could possibly come next. Anyway, the whole point of this story is that I was singing my version of this song (and other songs too) to my 19-month-old granddaughter last night while trying to rock her back to sleep. She was drifting off slowly, occasionally opening her eyes. Her nose was a little stuffy and she was uncomfortable but she was obviously trying to fall back asleep. When I got to the last verse ‘He puked up all the Girl Scouts,’ Doodle Bug opened her eyes and very loudly responded, “Gross!” I didn’t realize she was even listening to me. It was a moment I won’t soon forget!

Random Thoughts….

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Tonight I woke up from a short nap, (Yeah, I’m old and I need a nap on occasion) and something made me think of the phrase “shit on a stick.” There are many meanings to that phrase and I’m going to ignore all of them but one because quite frankly most of them are disgusting. I’m thinking of corn dogs and caramel apples….foods you eat on a stick or in my house “shit on a stick.”

I’m not sure why or how the conversation even started because I just woke up, but I got to thinking about all the fun foods you can eat on a stick; foods served on a stick that must have originated with fairs and carnivals. It made eating food easier so you can walk and talk and have all that fun…..well, the fun we had when we were kids. I’m too tired for that kind of fun now but I still like “shit on a stick”.

There are more foods on a stick than I had initially thought. There are the best-known foods like caramel apples, corn dogs, cotton candy, suckers, popsicles, ice cream bars, the Chinese favorite chicken on a stick, and backyard favorites, kabobs, and corn on the cob. I did a quick Google Search and found several others, many of which I have never heard of and don’t even know what they are. I found a few familiar foods that sounded like they might be good….not good for you, but good. There’s meatballs, pretzels, frozen & chocolate-dipped bananas, sausages, frozen & chocolate-dipped Hostess Twinkies, deep-fried Hostess Ho Ho’s, pork chops, frozen candy bars and rice crispy treats.

It’s fun to eat “shit on a stick” isn’t it?

Oh, I almost forgot to mention one of my favorites…. Jose Jalapeño on a stick. See him in action below with Jeff Dunham and Peanut:

Beware The Snapping Turtle

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Wow.  My son, C.F. decided to go for a walk this evening. He found a baby snapping turtle. He brought it home and we ooed and awed at its tiny cuteness. Everyone except for D.M. He was fine until C.F. put it on the floor and the tiny little thing took off like the road runner.  We had to put him in a plastic bucket to get a picture because he was moving so fast! I was amazed at the fact that it was as tiny as a peppermint candy. I took a few pictures of “Tiny” and then C.F. returned him from whence he came….

Image Copyright Being Aunt Debbie

I remember someone telling me that snapping turtles jump and being a logical thinker and all, I didn’t believe it. However, I did some research and many people claim that they do, in fact, jump. I found a video on YouTube to share. They do jump, I suppose. Although it’s a bit more like a “push off” than anything else and I suppose if the dang thing is big enough, it could quite easily propel itself forward a great distance, especially if it’s pissed off. Oh, and word of warning: The bigger ones CAN take your finger off so proceed with caution when dealing with snapping turtles!

Watch out for ‘Jumping’ Snapping Turtles! LOL.

The Snakes Crawl In, The Snakes Crawl Out

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After spending about an hour on the computer yesterday afternoon, I decided it was time for a break. As I walked out of the bedroom, I noticed the long black, snake-like tail of something across the floor just in front of the door. For a split second I thought to myself, “Damn toys.” I almost reached down, grabbed it and threw it out from the middle of the floor. Then it dawned on me. My grandson has a bright green rubber snake, not a black one! I called out, “Dad, I think we have a snake in the house!” He says, “Really? Where?” I told him and as he came to look, the snake started moving. It slithered across the shelves by the washing machine and then went behind it.

Great. It’s not bad enough this snake found a way into the house but now he’s under the dang washing machine. I wasn’t worried that it was a poisonous snake. I was pretty sure it was just a black rat snake. We’ve had them before around the yard near the house so we figured he came from under the house. No wonder we haven’t heard mice in the wall for quite some time. They are good for that, you know. What the cats don’t catch, the snakes do! I wondered, how will we get him out of the house? I texted my son and told him we needed help. Dad tried to chase the snake out, but it wasn’t cooperating. My son finally showed up and the two of them tried to persuade that poor snake to come out so C.F. could capture it and put it outside. [We don’t kill things like half the other people that live out here in the country. Seems like if it moves rednecks want to kill it, no matter what it is!]

Of course, my grandson was curious and wanted to see what was going on. He came in to watch and pretty soon that snake slithered out from under the washing machine and headed towards D.M.! I wasn’t in the room at the time, but S.R. said he wasn’t too thrilled about that snake coming toward him so she snatched him up and got him out of the line of fire. Turns out, the snake was just headed towards the hole that he came in from. We plugged up the hole, hopefully keeping snakes and other critters….spiders….from coming in.

Snakes don’t really bother me much as long as I know it’s there. I wasn’t too thrilled about this guy being in the house though, wondering if it would crawl into bed with me some night or slither out from under the couch and scare the daylights out of someone! I didn’t want him to get so hungry he would go after the ferret either! Of course, if a snake slithered into the ferret cage and managed to eat the ferret, it would then be too fat to get out of the cage! I’m sure that the ferret would put up one heck of a fight too.

So, the snake slithered in and then it slithered back out. No harm, no foul, and it lived happily ever after.

Microwave Ice Cream…..

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Well, dad has gone and done it again. Seems like he’s always doing something (or not doing something) to make us wonder about him!

Dad usually has chocolate ice cream every night at around 9pm. He gets the 5 qt. tub of chocolate ice cream out of the freezer and sticks it in the microwave just for a few seconds to soften it. He scoops out some ice cream, puts the lid on the tub and puts it back in the freezer. He’s all set.

Last night, he went through his entire routine except he left out the part where he puts it back in the freezer. Instead, he put it in the microwave. We didn’t find it until this morning when Dad went to reheat a cup of coffee!

Oh my!