Tag Archives: transgender

Stay In Your Own Lane

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Algerian boxer, Imane Khelif, was born a woman. She was born with some male chromosomes but that doesn’t make her a man. (There are many configurations besides XY and XX.) Khelif was born with female anatomy and determined to be female at birth. She was raised as a girl and she fights as a woman. She does not have an unfair advantage; she has been beaten several times.

It seems that the people bitching the most and perpetuating the misinformation are the same ones who think you should use the restroom corresponding to the gender that is on your birth certificate. The logic is nuts. I mean, if Khelif was born a woman then she would have to use the ladies’ restroom, yes? Then why shouldn’t she get in the boxing ring with females? Duh.

On a side note, their logic is kind of silly if you think about it. Picture this: A transgender man (born female at birth) is forced to use the ladies’ restroom based on gender assigned at birth. This burly trans-man with a beard walks into a ladies’ restroom to take a leak. Is this a scene that anyone would approve of? Especially if your 13 year old daughter had just gone into the restroom? Give me a break. That transgender man should be using the men’s restroom!

For those who don’t know or understand, being transgender means changing your physical appearance, including your genitals. This is done with hormone treatments and surgery. This isn’t done just willy-nilly. Many things are considered (age, gender identity, and mental and physical health) before being considered for transgender surgery. It is a long process. So that transgender man who just followed your daughter into the restroom, is no longer a woman and should not be using the ladies’ restroom!

We are all too quick to judge others. None of us know Khelif’s life story. None of us know how hard she has fought to get to where she is. She looks manly. So what? Big freaking deal! I have known several girls/women who look manly. That doesn’t make them men. And I have known boys/men who look girly. That doesn’t make them women.

Stop perpetuating lies, myths, and misinformation. Don’t believe everything you see and hear, on Facebook or otherwise. Stay in your own lane and don’t worry about how others live their lives. You do you. It’s really none of your business how others decide to live their lives. It’s not going to change the way you live your life, is it? Be a good human and not an asshole.

Accepting Others For Who They Are

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It shouldn’t be hard to do. We are all human. We all want the same things in life; love, happiness, acceptance, excitement, success, and the list goes on.

I always wondered how I would feel if one of my children came out as gay or transgender. I had no clue how things would change and it was worrisome. I knew I would still love them, of course, but had no idea if life as we knew it would change into something unfamiliar. In the world we live in today, it’s not hard to imagine the danger and hatred someone coming out might experience.

My children are not gay or transgender, but a very close family member has just come out as transgender, whom I will refer to as X. I can only hope everyone has been accepting and non-judgemental towards X; from what I have seen I think it’s been quite positive. X has family and friends who have been very supportive. I can’t imagine the difficulties this young person must have gone through, and how magnified that would have been without the support of friends and family!

In 2015 there were 21 transgender deaths. In 2016, 23 deaths were reported. Last year, 25 transgender deaths in this country! If that’s not bad enough, these people, THESE HUMAN BEINGS, were killed by acquaintances or partners, and some by total strangers! Over 2/3 of homicide victims are transgender women. Oh, and transgender people of color are 6 times more likely to experience police violence.

I don’t know about you, but this is unacceptable. We are all human beings. Some are thin, some are fat. Some have long hair, some are bald. Some are blond, some are brunette. Some are white, some are black. Some are gay, some are straight. Some are transgender. Get over it. These people have rights, just as anyone else. They are not animals and shouldn’t be treated as such.

How would you feel if it were your child? Your niece or nephew? Your cousin? If you would denounce them, then you don’t deserve them! Accept them for who they are. Treat them as you always did. Love them unconditionally.

Why should it be any different? Family is family. A true friend stands by a friend no matter what. Be supportive. Be kind.

It may take some time getting used to, and you may mess up pronouns and/or use the wrong name. It may even be a bit uncomfortable, but LEARN to ACCEPT and LOVE everyone for who they are.

Aunt Debbie