Eureka Cigarettes


I was in town this morning just for a few things. There was a woman who worked there who was fanning things on the shelves with a clipboard. I wanted to ask her what the fuck she was doing because it made no sense to me, but I kept my mouth shut.

As she approached me, I was overcome by the sickening gawd-awful stench of cigarettes! I wondered, didn’t she give a shit how she smelled? Did she even know she had the stinks? Holy crap. I mean, I used to smoke. Just a couple a day; a very light smoker. I used to work with smokers who smoked a lot more than I did. They never smelled that bad. Trust me, my nose (even when I was a smoker) could pick up on that stink yards away. I don’t think I’ve EVER run across anyone who smelled this bad! Holy crap, this woman smelled as though she smoked 3 packs or more a day!

Without even thinking, I raised my hand to my nose and covered it. She looked at me. I think she knew…or at least had a little clue that she must stink. I hope so! I wanted to tell her…

NO! I wanted to YELL at her:

“Come on, lady! You-Reek-of-Cigarettes!!!”