I’ve not been writing much lately. Seems there’s always something that causes me problems of some sort. I’ve been thinking in particular about my appointment with the eye doctor a couple of weeks ago. My entire body seems to be falling apart! My eyes are just the latest body part to decide to give me something else to worry about. I had noticed a change in my eyesight for the last few months. My eye doc confirmed that it was not my imagination. It appears that I have a cataract forming in my right eye. Yippee….and if that’s not enough he noticed also that I may have the early signs of macular degeneration. Isn’t that peachy.

So, I was wondering….considering all of the problems I have with my legs, knees, hips, back, hands…and now my eyes….is it possible that I have worn out my body parts from all of the activity in my life? I mean, I’ve never been much of an athlete but I was always very active.

Was it the endless hours on my roller skates when I was a kid? Was it the miles upon miles I put on my bicycle or my countless falls? Was it the hours I spent in the pool in the summer? Did those things put too much wear and tear on my body?

What about as I got older…. Did I do too much hiking and backpacking? Did I carry too much weight in my backpack? Did I watch too many sunsets or sunrises? Did I spend too much time on nature walks? Did I stare too long at the waves on lakes as I diligently watched my fishing line, waiting for a trout to bite? Was the bird watching with binoculars too much for my eyes?

As a young adult, did I spend too much time with children; playing games and entertaining them? Did I put too much energy into my home Day Care? Did my children keep me too active? Did I try too hard to teach my kids (and my Day Care kids) too much in one day, as if there wasn’t enough time to do it all? Did I take them to too many parks, museums, and fairs?

Did I utilize the ladies’ gym with too much zeal? Did I walk to work too many times? Did I read too many novels over the years? Did I crochet too many afghans? Did I use too much black yarn? (That shit is hard to see!)

When I worked as a Med Tech and CNA, did I lift too many patients? Did I put too much strain on my back and legs being on my feet all day long? When I had my own home business, did I spend too many hours on the computer, teaching myself code and building my own business website? Did I stand too long in the kitchen, creating my own bath & body products? What about the countless hours since the age of 20 that I spent cooking every meal from scratch so my family didn’t have to eat processed crap?

What about the hours and hours I spent with my kids on after-school activities? There was boy scouts, girl scouts, t-ball, baseball, soccer, football, ceramics class, guitar lessons, and surely there was more….

Have I done too much? Is this what has caused my body to wear out too soon? It’s not like I have climbed Mount Everest or scaled the Grand Canyon. I’ve never participated in races of any kind, never played professional sports, or been a gymnast. Surely I’ve not put my body through any more than anyone else.

Whatever the reason, I am old before my time. I must persevere, endure, and maintain as much mobility and independence as I possibly can.

Stupid body….

EDIT: Just so y’all know, this post was not completely serious. Yes, I have many physical problems but this was written with sarcasm intended. I know I didn’t wear my body out with activity!!