A rather annoying conversation began today when I ran into someone I haven’t seen since somewhere around 2002. I despise running into people I know when I’m trying to shop, always have. I mean, I’m trying to get my shopping done. I don’t have all day. Of course, now it’s because I have a chronic illness and I have to get done quickly so I can get home to rest, but a decade ago I just had other things to do than stand there and chit-chat in a store where my conversation isn’t private.
After the normal conversation starters like, hello and how are you, this woman I had run into asked me if I was in a car accident, why I was using a scooter, what happened, what does my doctor say…you know, the same ol’ same ol’. After giving her to-the-point answers, she followed me as I tried to get away from her. She asked, “Are you married yet or still single?” I said, “I’m happily single, thank you.” I thought her eyes would bug out of her head. “Oh my God. Are you serious? You’re still single?” I said, “Yeah, so?” She went on to talk about how God intended us to marry and bear children. Yadda, yadda. I said, “Honey, I didn’t need to be married to the asshole I was with in order to have children! I have 2 if you recall and now I have 4 beautiful grandchildren.” I was trying to shift the conversation to the blessing of having kids and grandkids. It wasn’t working. She said, “You should have been married!” Seriously. I could not believe she said that.
That’s when I decided if I wanted to get the hell out of Walmart, then I’d better be rude and put her in her place. I never liked her anyway.
“I’m still single. What’s it to you?” She didn’t know what to say. “There is nothing wrong with being single,” I told her. “I don’t have a man telling me what to do or expecting me to do this, that or the other.” Her mouth fell open at this point. I continued, “I am very happily single. I get to do whatever the hell it is I want to do. I don’t have to consult with anyone. I don’t have to worry about some man’s baggage because all the baggage I want to carry is my own.” She started to speak, most likely something ignorant or condescending. I cut her off, “I am not one of those women who base their self-worth on whether or not they have a man in their life. Besides, I’ve not met a single soul out here in your precious Ozarks that even remotely interests me.” I could have (should have) quoted my friend, Veronica, who would have thrown a few colorful adjectives in there about ‘knuckle-dragging, inbred assholes’ but I didn’t. Instead, I added, “Was there anything else you’d like to know about my private life?” She just hmmph’d under her breath and walked away disgusted. Good, I thought, I won’t have to deal with you again.
I have chosen to remain single because I like it that way! What the hell is it to anyone how I decide to live my life? I do not need a man to define me. I know who I am and I fought long and hard after my 12-year relationship with CP to regain my self-confidence. It’s no one else’s business how I have chosen to live my life. If I had met someone and a relationship developed, then that would have been fine, but I was not nor will I ever be, actively looking for someone just for the sake of being with someone! I’m not that desperate!