The Ex-Files – Father’s Day Brunch

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When my daughter started Kindergarten, I was thrilled because she was lucky enough to have been placed in the class with the best teacher she could have had. Her name was Mrs. Hummel if I remember correctly. She was fantastic! She showed a genuine love for the kids and made every day a day full of fun and a lot of learning! SR was excited to go to school every single day!

In May that year, Mrs. Hummel arranged a fabulous Mother’s Day Tea Party and all the kids made special invitations for their moms. SR was so excited about it, that’s all she could talk about. All the kids made their moms paper mache wide-brimmed hats with pretty pink paper and artificial flowers adorned each one. We had tea and cake and the kids sang songs and gave their moms special cards for Mother’s Day. It was a beautiful day of appreciation. I still have that pink, wide-brimmed hat, too! I packed it carefully in a big box and had it shipped to Missouri when we left California.

In June, the kids (with the help of that wonderful Mrs. Hummel) planned a Father’s Day Brunch for all their fathers. I knew what was going to happen however and didn’t look forward to the event, not one little bit. The kids decorated ball caps with fabric paint. Honestly, I don’t recall much about that day except that it did not turn out as it should have.

SR was excited for her “Pop” to come to her classroom for the Father’s Day Brunch. I had made sure to tell CP about it and marked it on the calendar. Of course, he said, “I may not be able to get off work.” And I told him, “That’s why I’m telling your 3 weeks in advance. That way you can request the day off. SR is so excited about it and you need to make sure you go.” He said he would try and then went off to work. Every 4 days or so, I reminded CP about the Father’s Day Brunch. He ignored me as if I was annoying him or nagging him. It was important but he didn’t give a shit, obviously.

CP never said anything about getting the day off. I stopped mentioning it because I knew no matter what he wasn’t going to show up. The morning of the brunch, SR was jumping up and down and just couldn’t contain her excitement. I felt awful for her. I walked her to school and pulled Mrs. Hummel to the side and told her that if SR’s father didn’t show up, and if SR wanted to, to please have her call me and I would come to fill in. I didn’t want her to feel bad and be the only one there without someone. Just as I expected, I got a phone call and I headed off to the school.

I was so angry and hurt for my daughter that day. She didn’t seem to mind that it was mom and not Pop there that day. But I minded. He should have at least tried. After all that, my daughter still wanted her Pop to have the ball cap she made for him.

I was so angry, I didn’t speak to him for days, but I doubt he even noticed. What kind of a loser lets his child down like that? A rat bastard, that’s the kind.

14 thoughts on “The Ex-Files – Father’s Day Brunch”

  1. Oh my friend, we could exchange stories about how the asshole losers we married have disappointed their children. I’m so sorry that your daughter went through that. All I know is, when they become adults they will remember all the shit their fathers put them through. My two youngest don’t even talk to their asshole dad because he’s disappointed them so often they just stopped caring about his stupid ass. They celebrate Fathers Day by giving me what they would have given their dad. They tell me Happy Fathers Day mom, because you were both mom & dad to us. But I will say this, those assholes will eventually want to engage with their kids at one point. Probably when they start to get old and no one wants their stupid asses anymore. That’s when they’ll begin to see what they did when and if their kids, like my two youngest, want nothing to do with them.

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    • My kids are both grown and have had questions regarding their dad but they really don’t have many memories. they were 6 and 3 when we left. My son is 29 and my daughter is 32. I think my ex knows better than to call me or come around here. I have warned my kids that if they start a relationship with him at some point, it’s entirely up to them but if they do, they shouldn’t let him stay with them because they will never get rid of him. That’s what he will do when he needs a place to stay… He’ll try to manipulate his way in and he won’t ever leave. I know how he operates.

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  2. Oh man! He didn’t even try. It’s almost as if he didn’t care. Your daughter has a heart of gold still giving Daddy the baseball cap and not being mad. Does she still have a relationship with him?

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